Controlling Your Finances or Just Being Responsible?

[brianpratt]

A husband got his wife out of $150,000 in gambling debt, but only under strict conditions—he takes over her finances, sets her a budget, and she has to ask permission for purchases over $50. Now she’s upset because he won’t let her go on a girls’ trip, even though she wanted to use her credit card again. Their friends called him controlling, and she didn’t defend him.
Do you think he’s financially responsible or just too controlling?

 

[wrightbrandon]

Tbh, I’d feel trapped in a setup like this. I get why he’s doing it, but she’s an adult. If he treats her like a child, she’s gonna act like one

 

[sarahburton]

Tbh, I’d feel trapped in a setup like this. I get why he’s doing it, but she’s an adult. If he treats her like a child, she’s gonna act like one

I hear you, but how else does she earn back trust? You don’t just go from losing $150K to ‘I promise I’ll be responsible now

 

[randalldavid]

I was in deep once. What helped me wasn’t my wife controlling my spending, but therapy, self-exclusion, and handing over my cards by choice. It has to come from her

 

[gutierrezchristopher]

Ok, but what’s the end goal? Is he supposed to manage her money forever? She needs to actually learn financial responsibility, not just follow his rules